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Small-Jessamine
Jesika
Artist | Hobbyist | Photography
Czech Republic
Hi guys, I'm 18 years old girl that loves taking photos because it gives me a possibility to see the world my own way. But time is not my friend so sadly I don't have much time to do what I love. I'm a strange person, but there's nothing I can do about it. My biggest goal is to be free, to do what I love without any consequences. It's impossible, but that's why we call it dreams, right? Feel free to talk to me, I love meeting new people over the internet (in real life, it's a bit harder). Let's be crazy together!
Interests
I should have never come to Canada. Cause now I have a huge hole in my heart for not being there.

Hi guys!

How are you all doing? I hope you're not getting so stressed from the start of school (as I do).

So I spent last 3 weeks in Canada and it was absolutely amazing. I got the chance to meet my dear friends and I didn't want to leave. I cried. A lot. And I miss them so much. You can't even imagine. I felt much better there. Maybe because all my troubles stayed in here. That doesn't mean I got rid of depression and anxiety, sadly, these things follow you everywhere. But in general, I felt happier. And I was really sad to leave. It felt like a new start, and these 3 weeks were one of the best ones in my life. I would go back immediately if I could. But it doesn't work that way. I gotta finish my last year of high school. And that's gonna be hard. To be completely honest with you, I'm freaking out. Tommorow is the first day of school for me. And I'm freaked out. I don't know how I'm gonna deal with it. I have to start looking for universities really soon and it makes me feel like crap. All the stress is coming to me in huge waves and I can't take it. I'm having anxiety attacks and I'm breaking down. It really sucks. I envy people who are okay. Yes, they are stressed too, or they are afraid. But they don't let it inside of their heads. They can deal with it. Most of the people can deal with it. And I'm not one of them. I'm scared of what my future will bring. I'm scared I won't get to uni. I'm scared I won't finish my last year of high school. Everything is happening too fast and I'm just being dragged by it, not being able to stop for a moment and look at it without freaking out. I don't know what to do. Right now, I just want to not be. 

Eugh, and I wanted this journal to be at least a little bit positive. Guess it's not how things work in my life. I'm sorry for being so sad, there's just too much going on in my life and I'm not handling it well. I'll add some photos when I get a chance to do so, right now, I should focus on the start of school and on looking for universities. Wish me luck, guys, and I hope you're doing better than I do.
  • Mood: Shitty
  • Listening to: The Lighthouse And The Whaler - Iron Doors

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:iconjoe-maccer:
Joe-Maccer Featured By Owner 4 days ago
:iconblacksparklesplz::iconblankboogieplz::iconfaveplz:Thanks, Jasmine!:iconblacksparklesplz:
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:iconsmall-jessamine:
Small-Jessamine Featured By Owner 4 days ago  Hobbyist Photographer
You're welcome! :tighthug:
Thank you kindly for the points, Joe :heart:
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:iconjoe-maccer:
Joe-Maccer Featured By Owner 4 days ago
My pleasure dear friend. :tighthug::rose:
I hope you have a great holiday season. santa monkey 
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:iconsmall-jessamine:
Small-Jessamine Featured By Owner 3 days ago  Hobbyist Photographer
Same goes to you! :tighthug: :iconchristmastimeplz: :iconchristmas-tree2plz:
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:iconoliverbphotography:
OliverBPhotography Featured By Owner Dec 11, 2014  Hobbyist Photographer
Thank you for the favs !:D
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:iconsmall-jessamine:
Small-Jessamine Featured By Owner Dec 12, 2014  Hobbyist Photographer
My pleasure :)
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:iconoliverbphotography:
OliverBPhotography Featured By Owner Nov 25, 2014  Hobbyist Photographer
Thanks for the fav, my dear! Glad you like it. :)
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:iconsmall-jessamine:
Small-Jessamine Featured By Owner Nov 26, 2014  Hobbyist Photographer
Always my pleasure :)
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:iconnerahye:
Nerahye Featured By Owner Nov 24, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Thank you for the :+fav:! :heart:
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:iconsmall-jessamine:
Small-Jessamine Featured By Owner Nov 25, 2014  Hobbyist Photographer
My pleasure! :tighthug:
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